Anatomical Heart Valentines for Passive-Aggressive Jewish Moms

anatomically correct heart valentine

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Feeling snarky about Valentine’s Day at your kid’s secular school?

Or, are you just a bit bored with craft-foam hearts?

Or, do you worry you might damage yourself and others if you see one more Pinterest board full of cloyingly twee DIY Valentines?

Too bad. Your Jewish kid still has to cough up 18 sealed, unmarked Valentines to distribute at the class party.

This might help. It helped me: copyright-free images of anatomical hearts. Vintage, and thus less likely to induce gag reflexes of children with excessive post-nasal drip (been there).

Slide image onto desktop and into Word or similar program. Duplicate, resize, print onto cardstock and your kid can color, trim, and add to cards. Go crazy and make a pop-up.
Do provide a reference so she can see which bits are blue and which bits are red (and hopefully ask why).

I found the hearts in black/white and shaded pink via The Graphics Fairy, here.
I just noticed she mentions using the hearts with shrinky dinks. OH, the possibilities!

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3 responses to “Anatomical Heart Valentines for Passive-Aggressive Jewish Moms

  1. Great idea! If you want to write something special in the valentine check out The Big Book of Cards & Toasts for Almost All Occasions: Express Yourself in Rhyme by Marcia Goldlist at

  2. LOL. These are great, Joanna. I should have checked here before sending the kids off today – one with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle valentines and the other with kittens. Do you think I should make up one of these for my wife? Hmm, she may or may not appreciate the humor. Maybe I’ll just play it safe and get some flowers.